Being asked to speak on the Big Book at my home group I had the opportunity to decide on which was my favorite selection from the book. I know that this changes probably daily but the selection I chose was on pages 60-63 on the subject of Step Three. I know that I have personally worn out these pages over the years and I think that if I could have four pages to use as a guide for my life it would be these pages.
Over the years Step Three has been my comfort and solace. When-ever life’s day to day problems become overwhelming I remember that I am in God’s hands and that if I am spiritually sound I am turning my life and will over to the care of God on a daily basis. It is when I take back my will and begin to become the director of my own play that I begin to get into trouble.
If there is a problem in my life I look at these few pages and I realize that more times than not my difficulties are of my own making. The phrase that annoys me the most because of its truth is “we invariably find that sometime in the past we have made decisions based on self which later placed us in a position to be hurt.” This means that anytime I put my will first and go against what I know is right for me, sooner or later down the line I will pay for it. I will pay by discomfort, fear, anxiety and pain.
How many times have I taken the wrong turn when I found myself at the crossroads of doing what was right for me as opposed to what would make me feel good in the moment? We are always confronted with these choices; in the workplace, in relationships and in our friendships. Did I take a job I knew I wouldn’t like for the money? Did I get into a relationship that was quick and easy rather that remaining in one that required work? Did I overlook a close friend to be with others more prominent or important? Am I surprised that people wish to retaliate?
Step Three reminds me that there is a remedy for this self-centered ness and self will run riot and it is: “Established on such a footing we became less and less interested in ourselves, our little plans and designs. More and more we became interested in seeing what we could contribute to life. As we felt new power flow in, as we enjoyed peace of mind, as we discovered we could face life successfully, as we became conscious of His prescense, we began to lose our fear of today tomorrow or the hereafter. We were reborn.”
Realizing that I can only change my own attitudes, actions and behaviors I learn to be responsible for my own life and to take action to change and grow. When the problems in my life are beyond my control I must realize that I am not in charge. This is “the wisdom to know the difference” that we talk about in the serenity prayer. Step Three allows me the acceptance to let go and let God. Be they financial issues, health issues, relationship issues or family issues, if there is nothing I can do to help the situation I turn them over to my Higher Power.
Our solution : “This is the how and why of it. First of all, we had to quit playing God. It didn’t work. Next, we decided that hereafter in this drama of life, God was going to be our director. He is the Principal; we are His agents. He is the Father, and we are His children. Most good ideas are simple, and this concept was the keystone of the new and triumphant arch through which we passed to freedom.”
How simple it is!! I turned my alcoholism over to the care of my higher power and I haven’t had a drink for many years. It works. If it works for my alcoholism why won’t it work in all my daily affairs?. It will!. Simple!!!